Realization (Illumi x reader)
by himechan no kokoro 01
Summary: In here a girl by the name of (name) has been working for the Zoldycks for a few days now. What if she fell in love with a certain long haired member of the family? Thinking that she fears him.
1. Chapter 1

It had been 3 days since it started…

-3 days ago- _[flashback]_

Once again, she kept nagging about it…

"Why don't you become a maid of the Zoldycks?" My friend Ria asked. "I mean you're good at fighting, especially when you use Nen. To top it off you're like an elite maid that fell from the sky! I remember when you helped with our housework once, you finished one batch of dirty dishes within 5 minutes! 5 minutes! And when I checked it, it was spotless!" she exclaimed.

"Yeah, and the next thing I know my head is in some kind of gallery or better yet a garbage can." I said plainly. Seriously she never gives up on convincing me. "That won't happen!" She said in counter. "Oh really what makes you think so? Have you forgotten that they're a family of professional assassins?!" I said in frustration. Any moment now I'm going to snap but might as well give up anyway she's been going non-stop like that for 2 weeks now, and well, I JUST CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE! "Just believe me please~?" She said using puppy eyes. Sigh. "FINE! But if I die I'm going to hunt you." I said in defeat.

_-End of flashback-_

So far the tasks given to me were easy. That is for me. "(name)!" I heard Gotoh call me. "Yes?" I said in response. "Put these dishes on the table, now." I took the dishes and placed them on the table like I should. A few moments later the Zoldycks came down to eat lunch. As I was about to leave lady kikyou called me "(name), please call Illumi to come down and dine with us." She said in a flat tone. "Yes kikyou-sama" I replied then bowed. After that I went to Illumi's room. "Illumi-sama lady has requested you to dine." I said and he nodded, then he walked passed me and went to the dining hall. Honestly I'm scared of Illumi. Whenever he's around I can feel myself becoming nervous, my face heats up a bit and my heart is beating fast non-stop, of course unless he disappears. So assume that this is fear I am feeling.

I went to the dining hall and went to one of the corners so if any one of the Zoldycks needed something. For example, now. "(name), please get some chocolate" killua said. "Yes Killua-sama." So I went to the kitchen and took a bar of chocolate and gave it to Killua. "Here it is Killua-sama" I said as I handed him the chocolate. "Thanks" he simply replied to me. As I returned to my spot I heard lady kikyou speak " So, anyways Illumi you are 24 now am I correct?" she asked her oldest son. "Yes, mother" He replies with the same poker face I see 24/7. "Since you are old enough I suppose you should get married for the next heir." She said to him. _'What?!' _I said in my thoughts as my heart dropped. Why do I suddenly feel so down? Shouldn't I be happy that Illumi is going to get married and will get out of my sight for once? It feels so weird it's like a part of myself had just died or something.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

It has been 2 days since their conversation about their heir was discussed. The Zoldyck family has been sending other families to see Illumi. All the girls he's been talking to seem to be rich so far, but for what I know none was picked yet. So, the Zoldycks decided to hold a contest or tournament for Illumi. Female servants or workers were required to join so there will be more contestants for Illumi. Then again, now that I think about it, that would mean I'm required to join aren't I? Then I went to lady Kikyou's room to ask permission to forfeit. "Kikyou-sama may I request to forfeit the tournament?" I asked. "No, as I had already announced all workers and servants are required to join." She replied. I sighed in disappointment. Looks like I have no choice then. I have one more day to prepare before the tournament.I began to pack some things I may need.

-1 day later-

Today is the day. As we were gathering in the area I noticed around 10 – 15 more girls joining other than the servants. Tsubone is not here or part of it cause, she's kind of out of age already. So naturally that would mean she is exempted or to put it in a more specific way she is excused of the tournament, lucky woman. So, anyways the first challenge is how we act towards Illumi. One girl gets send in one room at a time. I was 3 rd to the last of the line and as I was waiting I saw some girls come out with disappointment in their faces, but some had a normal or satisfied face. Then came my turn, as I entered the room I felt so nervous I could already run, but of course I can't. "Good morning, Illumi-sama" I said with respect to him as I sat down on a chair. "Good morning (name)-san." And that's where our whole conversation started . We didn't really talk much cause cause we only get 1 minute each person. We only manager to talk about ourselves like my age what my life's like and all then, times up. Illumi said that I passed this one. The next challenge is still tomorrow and for what I know it's more of a fight to the death thing, which means I need to start training.

The results show that a few girls are out so far 2 from the others and 1 from the servant and when I read it, it said mitsuba. As I went back to my room I passed by Illumi so I bowed. "Good evening Illumi-sama" I said. When I was about to leave Illumi took a hold of my arm and said "See me later after dinner. Continue what you said about the reason why you work here." He said to me and left, leaving me dumbfounded. After they had dinner the other members of the family stood up and left while Illumi went to me and led me outside the mansion.

"Continue with what you said." He somewhat commanded me and I obliged. "As I was saying earlier my friend Ria forced me to, but not really forced she just kept on nagging me to join so I gave up and became a servant." I told him simply. "About your friend Ria. What is her last name?" He asked curiously, but still no change in reaction. Still poker face. "her last name is Alberona, but I might as well tell you her full name. Her full name is Maria Elise Alberona" I answered his question, but one thing still kept me thinking. "Why do you ask Illumi-sama?"I questioned him. "Nothing just thought it was familiar." He replied. Then when I checked the time it was getting late I had to start training. "Um, Illumi-sama may I be excused? I still have to train for tomorrow." I said as I bowed. "I see, would you like me to train with you?" he asked. '_huh?' _something is obviously off about him now. Illumi offering to train me? The world must be ending! But nevertheless its real so I took his offer. "Y–yes Illumi-sama, thank you." I stuttered along the process. Something is really off tonight. As we began training time was running, so that means what felt like 5-10 minutes ended up being 35 minutes. "Thank you very much for training me Illumi-sama" I bowed in gratitude as I returned to my room. As soon as got there I took a shower and changed into new clothes, my old clothes were wet from sweat it really was hard. I thought I was going to die, but it made me stronger. Also while we were fighting I noticed he didn't even break a sweat at anything. Well I guess that's a Zoldyck for you. When I finished changing I went to sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 2

Today's the second challenge, but it will begin later at night. But in the morning I was informed that a very important family friend was coming, so as I always would, I cleaned most parts of the mansion set up flower arrangements on some rooms and prepare some snacks for the guests. For the snacks I prepared macaroon, sandwiches and earl grey tea. The guests will arrive by 10 o'clock it is currently 9:51 so they are expected within 9 minutes.

As I waited I just stood there waiting for the guests to arrive, and when 10 o'clock came the guests had already arrived. As they went in I bowed to show respect, and when I looked up I saw a very familiar face. "Ria?!" I whispered so no one else would hear. "Yo (name)-chan." She said with a smile. "Why are you here?" I asked her confused. "Were you not informed that there were important guests today?" She asked me. "Yeah, so are you trying to say you're the important guest." I said. "Yup, and this is one of the reasons why I wanted you to become a servant of the Zoldycks." She announced happily. "Then why didn't you just hire me or something? Plus what about the chores I helped you with before? Was it not your house?" I asked all the questions that formed in my head all at once. "Okay, slow down. The reason why I didn't hire you is because at that time I didn't want you to know that I was some richy – rich girl, so I made myself look like an average like you, and I don't want you as a servant, I want you to be my friend. As for the chores, it's still my house. Like I said I didn't want to look like a rich kid next door. Questions answered?" She explained like it was one of the common things a person should know. "Yes." But she answered my questions that good enough for me. "But one more thing. Why the Zoldycks?" I asked it was the last thing that was unanswered in my head. "That's because, They're the family closest to my family, and I came here to see Killua, cause y'know I kinda like him." She said with a tomato face. Now that I think about it Ria is about 10 years younger than me, so that makes her 9 years old.

"*cough*, so anyways please allow me to escort you to your room young mistress." I said and started to move and she followed. "Kikyou-sama, Alberona-sama has arrived." I called out to lady kikyou. "Ah, yes please allow her to enter." She responded as I opened the door and left the 2 to talk. I waited for Ria nearby the entrance doors, and as I was waiting Illumi and Killua have returned from training. "Welcome back Illumi-sama, Killua-sama."I said as I bowed. "Yo." Illumi-sama said. "Osu." Killua said after Illumi. "(name) can I have a word with you later?" Illumi asked. The moment he asked that I thought I was going to be punished later.

Later on as Illumi said I was going to talk to him so I went to his room and knocked. "Illumi-sama, your request to speak with me." I said. "Come in." He said. "What did you want to talk about Illumi-sama?"I asked. "It's about the guest, Ria, she's your friend right?" He asked me. "Yes we met in a town." I answered. "I noticed she's been looking at kiru a lot lately." He stated with with a very dangerous aura surrounding him. "Kiru doesn't need friends he'll just end up betraying them, and they'll end up betraying Kiru. Me and father have raised Kiru in that lifestyle, born to be a professional assassin, a cold hearted killer. " He added in a monotone voice. "But Illumi-sama I think is natural to have friends with that kind of lifestyle or not. We're all still human." I said hoping to not get scolded. He just looked at me with a blank face. "Besides are you not friends with Hisoka?" I responded, dropping the sama since he is not my master or mistress. " I guess you have a point, but Hisoka is just a contact or a person to talk to me." He said.

Before I knew it the challenge was about to begin in 15 minutes. "Anyways, Illumi-sama, I will be taking my leave now." I said as I left the room.


	4. Chapter 4

After I left Illumi's room I went to my room first to get my weapon. '_The next challenge is a battle.' _ I thought to myself, but not to the death, only possibly. In the middle of the battle if a competitor dies, she dies none cares, but if she lives but just fainted, then she lives. Simple as that. After that I took my knife and some bullets. Yes bullets no gun. It was 3 minutes before the next challenge so I rushed to the venue.

"The next challenge is a battle. Last one standing wins." Lady Kikyou announced to us. The remaining 16 competitors.

We went to our positions and waited for the gun shoot. While waiting I remained calm so I wouldn't damage myself later on. Then the gun shoot sound came. I ran as fast as I could looking for the others, then I sensed someone from behind me. So I turned around quickly and used my Nen to shoot using my bullets. Each finger can control one bullet so as I threw 10 bullets in the air I focused my Nen on them, then I shoot. You could say It's like Gotoh's coin shooting ability combined with Illumi's pin or needle throwing ability. Although I added a twist to it. With the 10 bullets I only managed to shoot the right arm and leg as she ran to the left. So instead of wasting my 'missed' bullets I reformed them back to their original form and shot it at the person again. This time I got her with 8 bullets, but she's killed. It's alright though. _'15 remaining.'_ I though as I went to an open area. Right there I felt 2, no 3 people watching me from behind. And at the moment one of them stood up and went up to me I merely stood there as she charged. I took my knife and threw it straight at her head. She screamed as blood gushed out. I raised my hand and at the same time the knife lifted up, nothing holding it, just my aura. And I swayed my hand to the right as the knife did the same and went further distance. Then I closed my hand as the knife charged forward killing the 2 behind the bush. _'13'_ I thought as I continued. I made the others faint instead so there will be no further lives taken. Then came the final competitor, it was a girl with a scythe as a weapon. As both of us charged in, she took a gun from her pocket and started shooting. I took the knife and deflected them. She looked shocked as I ran faster. My knife lifting up aiming at her, as I closed my hand the knife charged in fast and pierced her through. I wasn't planning to kill anymore, but no choice. I walked out of the venue and went straight to my room. I took a shower to cool myself down. That was obviously tiring, who knows what could have happened if I died. Wait, that means I won. I should have pretended to faint instead! Why did this not ring in my head?! I consider Illumi as my friend even though I feared him, but I do not consider him as my lover. After I took a shower I laid down the bed.

'_I heard there's a final challenge for me but what is it?'_ I thought as I fell asleep.


	5. Chapter 5

~ next day ~  
>I heard that there was a special challenge for me but didn't know what. I did the thing I would usually do in mornings do chores and serve. The job is really simple, people just complicate through their own thinking. Once I was done I went back to my room and rested for a bit.<p>

Soon I heard a knock on my door one of the servants said to me. "Kikyou-sama requests you." He said simply and left. Then I went to Lady Kikyou's room as requested. "(name), I suggest you prepare yourself and your weapons for the next challenge. You will be facing another battlelater on and it's not as easy as you think. Therefore I warn you now. You are dismissed." She said as I left. _"I wonder what she meant… Was I going to fight a terrible beast or something? Am I going to fight mike the dog?"_ I thought as questions flooded in my head.

I began to prepare my bullets and knife as usual. But I added another weapon with as I went to the venue. When I got there the whole Zoldyck family was there. I couldn't believe my eyes _" What is going on?"_ I thought as Illumi walked towards me but distanced at around 4 meters. "(Name)." I heard lady kikyou. "What is it Kikyou sama?" I asked. "This is what I told you to prepare for . In this challenge you are going to fight your soon-to-be husband, Illumi!" She said. _'so this is why they're all here. Hey wait! I'm gonna fight Illumi?! Might as well give up I'm an obvious death here!'_ I though with a panicked face. "wait, ki-." "START!" I couldn't finish my sentence as Illumi started throwing needles. I dodged as fast as I could and as I could see him starting to aim I took my bullets, and aim then shoot. At that time all I could do was deflect Illumi's pins. I stood there getting ready to defend as Illumi kicked me. Since I managed to defend that he took my arm and threw me to the air. Then I used my new weapon. I took the whip and whipped Illumi's arm as I used it to pull myself closer to Illumi which means charging at him.I took the knife as I started trying to stab him. He defended using pins with his other hand. I kicked him in the stomach as I jumped back away from him. With my whip still around his arm I used all my strength to lift him up in the air and slam him back down. And it worked, but it wasn't over. As I took my whip from his arm, he stood up. Not wanting him to beat me up. I took my bullet and shot him on the shoulder with the nen energy in it. The battle continued. It's been hours already since we've been fighting. I seemed like a no end fight. I was losing my energy. _"How long will I last?" _I thought to myself as I was starting to lose consciousness. Then Illumi charged forward and knocked me out.

Later on I woke up in my room. My eyes widened. '_did I lose?'_ I thought. Then, "(name) Kikyou-sama is looking for you." The servant said outside the door. "Ok, I'm coming." I replied as I set myself up and sent to her room. "How may I help you Kikyou-sama?" I asked. "(name), It's about earlier." She said. Yeah I know I lost. Then she said, "you lost against Illumi. But you will still be marrying him." She stated. What?! Why? I lost didn't I? "And in case you are wondering why, that's because you have impressed us with your ability. Not much could last long against a battle with Illumi. So therefore you are engaged to Illumi Zoldyck." She stated. "Y-yes, Kikyou-sama" I stuttered. My face going red again. '_I don't want!'_ I thought as I left the room.

~ 2 days later~  
>It had been 2 days since Lady Kikyou announced that I was getting married to Illumi. I called Ria to come over and help.<br>~ 10 minutes later~  
>Ria came in the door and went straight to me. "Needed advice?" she said smiling. We went to my room and sat down on the bed. "You see I won this contest thing which was required for me and I have to marry Illumi. But the thing is I don't want to." I explained. "What makes you so sure?" she asked. Well whenever he's there my heart pounds harder, my face glows red and I become nervous. What makes me so sure it's fear? In one movie I watched there's this girl with a guy and every time he went close to her The same symptoms happen and at that time she was screaming in her mind <em>' Get away!<em>' Answered your question?"I explained. After that she laughed and looked at me as if I was crazy. "You love him." She replied, "What…?" I asked confused. "You love him. You said that the girl thought she wanted to get the guy away right? That's because she's embarrassed to be around him. It must be those romance movies that's been going onTV. Why didn't you know did you finish that certain show you watched?" I said. "No, I thought it was getting risky and violent I turned the TV off." I replied. "I see… Anyways the ones in the movie probably ended up together and all. So… just to clarify things you're not scared of him you're in love with him. So don't worry." She said and smiled. "Ok… but do you think he loves me back?" I asked. "… I'm sorry I don't know I'm not close enough to him to read him like a book. Not to mention his expressionless face." She answered. "Anyways, thanks. To think a 10 year old know more than a 19 year old." I laughed. "It's alright that's life and I have my resources." She said then she left.

Later on after my talk with Ria I just stayed there in my room. I never thought that I would like Illumi. And I don't know if he'll like me back. So I decided to discover it myself. I knocked on the door to Illumi's room. "Illumi-sama may I just ask you something?" I asked outside the door waiting for him to respond if he's there. "Come in." He replied as I opened the door. "What do you want to ask about?" He asked. "It's about our engagement." I answered. "What about it?" He added. "Since both of us know we're getting married. I was wondering if you actually want to marry me… More specifically saying, I'm asking you if you love me." I said forming my hands into a fist. "How about you?" He asked. "Huh?" I said dumbfounded. "Do you love me?" He asked me. "…Yes" I replied my head facing the floor. "What made you love me? An assassin, a killer, a murderer… what made love someone like that? " He added to his question. Now that I think about it what made me love Illumi as I looked back at Illumi I thought of reasons. I tried to remember what made me love him back then. I remembered when I first came here. My first day working. I wasn't known as a part of the Zoldyck estate yet. So the dog named Mike took me as an intruder. I stood there freezed at my spot. Before it came charging he was stopped by Illumi, the eldest son of Silva and Kikyou Zoldyck. Then he asked "Who are you?". "Umm I'm (name), and I came here to apply as a servant." I replied. "… I see okay, follow me." he said. He seemed hesitant at first even though he has an expressionless face. I followed as he led to the mansion. I thought he was a nice man for an assassin but then came the next day. The day after I applied Some people wanted to take the Zoldyck properties so they came to the mansion, armed. Then after that some were facing mike and the others went on. As they about to get nearer I was outside taking a break then one man I saw one man charging in the house. Since it was just one man I came down the tree and got ready to fight him with my fist cause I got no weapons then. By the way he was shooting it was easy to dodge but the a sudden pain shot through my right arm, then came more. Another on my leg, stomach, it was unbearable. I fell down to the ground I saw a man jump down. It was Illumi. He took his pins and threw it at the men. I couldn't believe it. They were all down with one pin on them. I had mixed feelings. Relief and fear. I felt relieved that I was saved, but I was afraid of my own savior. As I came back to reality I explained it to him. And he simply nodded then said, "That's a relief." My head snapped up trying to analyze what he said. "Somehow I knew you were different. You saw me as Illumi not as a profits person, not a moneybag just Illumi. Although I was shocked at one part. You thought I was a nice person… nobody really thought of that, knowing I kill mercilessly." He hugged me. "I'm glad someone could see through my expressionless mask. And… I have to admit I love you too." Then after our conversation, or rather our confession I went back to my room flushed.


End file.
